Spartan Laser

The Spartan Laser

Spartan Laser Blast

Ouch. Ouch ouch ouch.

The Spartan Laser (also called the Spartan LAZ0R, the Super Gun, and the Amazing legendary Energy Blast Generator that will disintegrates those alien freaks to a fire) is an energy beam firing weapon commonly used by Master Chief when he needs to disintegrate stuff, and the Teletubbies on an occasional basis.

The Spartan Laser is manufactured by Spartan weapon makers. It is based around a battery in a metal shell. It is then encased in pure epicness. They then use their mail-rockets to deliver the weapons to whoever can afford them.


Gun: $10,000,000

Metal shell: $5,000,000

Plasma battery: $1,000,000 per battery (it takes 2 batteries just to use the gun, and they burn out in seconds)

Trigger Attachment Fee: $1,000,000

Optional Payment: $8,185,184.51

Shipping: $1,623,444

Handling: $18,251

Purchasing Fee: $918,516

Paying them money fee: $1,234,567

Total: $999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999.99 NOT